It was a Wednesday in September. I just sat down at the Starbucks in Yorkdale Mall, and quietly sipped on my tall black pike. I was only in e-contact with Negin for less than a month prior (with only slight contact with our busy schedules), so picturing what her and Mo looked like as a couple wasn't something I could easily do. All I knew was that they were related to a couple I previously shot, and she was appreciative of the style/aesthetic I put into my films. *hint hint: that's how to make me blush*
So there I am, holding the fort at an empty table in the middle of a somewhat-busy Starbucks. Subtly stressing about how much I can joke around with them, thinking about what personal questions I could ask, how open they are with talking about themselves… could I possibly make a a deez nuts joke??
But then they walked up the stairs and I felt calm. There was something about them that made me feel like we were already friends. They looked just a few years older than I am, and the tables instantly turned when we shook hands. For as much as they had questions (e.g. - how long can you be present [all day], will you have a partner [yes], do you take credit card payments [no, but e-transfer works for the 50% deposit]) I slowly had more for them.
What was it like meeting for the first time?! How did you propose?! How did you know?!
And their answers will always be bouncing around in my head when someone asks me about relationships. I've written about this before, but it's such a powerful answer it deserves to be read over again. After asking about what it was like finding each other, and how it happened, one of the biggest things that stuck out to me was what he said to compliment her words.
*Note - the following is paraphrased*
After she had answered with
"You'll find her when you stop looking and when you least expect it",
he added on with
"Yes, that'll probably happen… but with most other successful happenings in life, you'll be prepared for it. Like the same way you do well on a test, or do well in business. You'll be internally prepared as an individual. I thought I was always prepared to be in a relationship, but it was actually when I was like 'No. NOW I know I'm really ready' when I finally met her. And I don't want to turn this into an esoteric answer, but it happens when you're confident, as an individual, to be in a relationship. A relationship you know you want. So you may not be explicitly looking when you find her, but you would have already been mentally/physically/financially ready for it when it happens."
In other words, yes, you're more likely to find them when you're not looking – but only because you are, and you have been, focused on bettering yourself. As an individual. And as someone for them.
I can't get enough of how poetic these two are, how inspirational they are, and how hopeful they make me (and hopefully anyone watching) feel for the future.
Ring: National Jewel Creations
Shoes: Rachel Simpson Shoes
Makeup: Fancy Face Inc
Wedding Suit: Surmesor
Photography: Mango Studios
Cinematography: Aaron Daniel Films